Remembering

Remembering

Today is Memorial Day. Our friends across the pond celebrate the day on a different date and call it Remembrance Day. The idea for both is the same; we honor the memories of those who have lost their lives for their country.

I say lost and not given as some might say, because I don’t think that most of those who we honor would have freely given up their lives if they had a choice. None of the men who lost their lives in Viet Nam chose to stand up and say as they do in the movies, “Today is a good day to die.” Instead they did what they had to do, and in the process they were killed.

Were they brave? Unbelievably so. Did they risk their own lives for others? Many did, and then lost their lives doing just that. Should we honor them? Without a doubt.

Should we honor the men and women who sent them there? No. Were the intensions of those who chose to send our armed forces there well meant? I hope so, or for those who believe in an afterlife they will live in torture for all time.

There is a passage in the last of J.K. Rowling’s books that I think is appropriate for us to think about today. The hero has just been killed by the villain, and is talking it over with his mentor. [Side Note: Yes, I know this sounds impossible but it is after all fiction that is loaded with magic, so you’ll just have to live with it,] His mentor says “Do not pity the dead, Harry. Pity the living” I think Rowling had it right.

All of the men and women who died were free of the fear of dying and the dread that infects your daily life when you think that death may come at any moment. Those who live beyond them and only have their memories are the ones to whom we should hold out pity and sympathy. If you doubt this you should have been watching the national Memorial Day celebration on the national mall last night. An actress, Selma Blair, portrayed a young widow of a soldier who was killed in Afghanistan. Her words spoke to who it was that suffers the most from the death of the fallen. Her loss, and the loss of her children, of that brave man who will no longer be there to share their lives, said where the pain lives after the death of one “of the brave.”

My family did not have to endure that sorrow, as did the families of many of the men I knew who were killed during that conflict. To them, and to all of the families of those who have died in the service of our country, I say remember the good, forget the bad, and live the best you can.